Talking to Brick Walls
by modalismodalism
Summary: Oneshot. Sometimes it's hard being a genius, Naruto Uzumaki knows this too well. Very vague Sasuke/Naruto.


**A/N:** Something random I wrote a while ago but deemed too stupd to post. Inspired by my sudden passion for drawing brick walls.

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At that moment, Sakura Haruno hated Naruto Uzumaki more than anything.

Anything.

That ramen-loving idiot was just so stupid, inconsiderate, stupid, and selfish, not to mention stupid. They had a goddamn mission that they needed to leave for, what? _Half an hour ago?_ That freaking fish-cake bastard. Sakura was going to kick his ass halfway to the moon…if she ever found him that is.

The pink-haired kunoichi raced through the forest, moving so swiftly that her feet barely touched the ground and all you saw of her was a blur of pink and red. She kept her eyes pealed for any sign of that familiar blond mop as murderous thoughts ran through her head.

Calm down Haruno, just stay calm and keep looking. I'm sure there's a perfectly good explaination why he's late. A perfectly good explaina-

There it was! That shock of orange and yellow perched on a wide tree branch. Sakura raced to the foot of the tree, ready to berate it's current idiotic inhabitant.

"Naruto! Get your ass down here right now so I can kick it!" She shouted indignantly while pointing at the boy.

"No! I'm busy!"

Sakura felt her eye twitch in irritation. Busy? What could that fool possibly be busy with? She looked a bit closer. Naruto was hunched over staring intently at a leaf of paper he held in his lap with one hand, the other hand scribbling furiously across the paper. He squinted in concentration with the tip of his tongue poking out of one of the corners of his mouth. It looked like he was writing something. Did Naruto even know how to write? Sakura's eye twitched again. She had more important things to do than ponder the mysteries of the universe.

"Damnit Naruto, get down here now! What the hell are you doing? We have a mission you moron!"

The blond boy looked up from his work to growl at Sakura in frustration.

"I know that! But we can't go until I'm done, I'm doing something important!" He shouted back at her before resuming his scribbling.

Sakura let out a huff of annoyance and folded her arms across her chest. Fine, if that's how that idiot wanted it, he could take the blame for being late.

Half a minute later Naruto looked up with a bright expression on his ink-splattered face.

"Done!" he chirped happily as he jumped off the tree and onto the ground next to Sakura. He was immediately met with a fist to the head.

"Ow! You're so mean Sakura-chan, what was that for?" Naruto whimpered as he nursed the rapidly forming bump on his head.

"You loser! Do you have any idea how late we are? What the hell was so important that we couldn't go until you were done?"

The boy grinned impishly as he proudly held up the paper to show Sakura the fruits of his labor.

"This is our first mission without Sasuke-teme right? So I thought I'd make this to bring along!" he happily explained.

Sakura stared at the paper, her eye twitched again and she could feel an angry tic forming in her left temple.

"Naruto," she began, trying to stay calm, "What exactly is this?"

"It's Sasuke-teme, duh." Naruto responded, the proud grin never leaving his face.

The pink-haired girl squinted at the paper with her head slightly tilted then lifted her head back up too look at Naruto's grinning face.

"This is definitely not Sasuke-kun." She articulated, drawing out each word.

"Yeah it is."

Sakura looked at the blond boy questioningly.

"Did you eat too much ramen or something? God, I swear. With the amount of MSG Ichiraku's uses it's a miracle you haven't had a heart attack yet." Sakura sighed. She closed her eyes and put a hand to her forehead. " Come over here and I'll take your blood pressure." She motioned for Naruto to sit down on a nearby rock. The boy didn't move.

"What're you talking about Sakura-chan? I'm fine."

"No you're not."

"Yes, I am." Naruto was getting confused now, Sakura was being so weird.

"You can't be fine."

"Why not?"

"You must have overdosed on ramen or something. You think a drawing of a brick wall is Sasuke, now come over here so I can take your blood pressure." Sakura pointed once again at the rock.

Naruto looked down at the drawing in his hands. There wasn't anything wrong with it, maybe Sakura just didn't understand. He was just too much of a genius for his own good sometimes. That was alright though, he could explain it to the poor girl.

"I thought that since Sasuke-teme is gone, we can bring this with us on our missions," he started to explain as he held up the paper, " It's like a replacement for him, so even if we can't talk to him we can talk to this." He waved the paper around a bit to make his point. Naruto could still see the confusion etched on Sakura's face. Perhaps he would have to break it down even more for her simple mind to comprehend.

"Kakashi-sensei once said talking to Sasuke is like talking to a brick wall. So I tried talking to that brick wall on the east end of the village and it's totally true, but we can't take a brick wall with us on our missions, so I drew one." Naruto's eyes shined with happiness as he said this, proud of himself for coming up with such a brilliant idea.

"I am going to kill Kakashi-sensei." Sakura muttered under her breath.

"Did you say something Sakura-chan?"

"No, nothing at all."

"Oh, okay then. Do you want to try it out?"

"Try what out?"

"The brick wall! Try saying something you'd say to Sasuke-teme." Naruto held the paper up in front of her.

"No way. I am not talking to a drawing of a brick wall." Sakura folded her arms and looked away in disgust.

"Come on Sakura-chan! Just once, I promise you it's exactly like talking to Sasuke-teme." The blond boy pleaded, dangling the drawing.

The kunoichi sighed in defeat.

"Fine, I'll try it once. But only once."

Sakura sucked in a breath in preparation before letting out an ear-splitting fangirl shriek.

"KYAAAAAAA Sasuke-kun! I love you!"

The paper remained silent in Naruto's hand, flappin slightly in the breeze. Sakura looked impressed.

"You're right, talking to that thing really is like talking to Sasuke-kun."

"You see? You see?" the boy chirped excitedly. "Isn't it great? We can take it on all our missions and it'll be just like having the three of us together again!" Naruto grinned widely as he rolled up the piece of paper. "Come on, the three of us have a mission to go on." He patted the drawing fondly. Sakura smirked.

"You're totally going to make out with that thing aren't you?"

"No!"

"You so are."

"…Maybe…"

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**A/N:** I'm a little bit ashamed of this story...anyways, I'd love to get some feedback on grammar, structure, characterization, anything really, so leave a review if you can.


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